From Mine to Ours

by | Dec 28, 2020 | Change |

From Mine to Ours

The inevitable has happened. Lego creations have been built and now the ‘Don’t play with it, it’s mine’ has set in. Christmas cheer comes with overwhelm too. And overwhelm combined with tiredness and even a sense of loss (as Christmas is ‘over’) results in some interesting reactions.

Perhaps it’s just our household, but I suspect not. Our kids are enjoying their gifts and feel a deep sense of ‘ownership’ over them and want to control them. Over time this will dissipate as the newness and the need for control wears off. But for now, separation helps keep the peace.

Interestingly I see similar behaviour in change processes. When people feel any sense of overwhelm with the change, they tend to ‘hunker down’ seeking to control a small patch. They look for stability, often something familiar. Something that is theirs. A space where they can observe and engage with the ‘new’. And as the ‘new’ or the change becomes a little more familiar, their behaviour changes too.

The natural human reaction to change is often to fight against it. We are wired that way. Change makers know this. Therefore, they create a space for this reaction. Acknowledge it. Normalise it. But change makers also know humans evolve, adapt. And need to in order to survive. Therefore, they don’t allow us to stay in this reactionary space. They continue to engage so the ‘new’ becomes a bit more ‘normal’.

Moving from ‘mine’ to ‘ours’ not easy work. But change makers never signed up for easy.

Photo by Ravi Palwe


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