My daughter wanted to play a game with me. She picked it, set it up, and told me where to sit. And then explained the rules. The game, ‘Pop to the shops‘, is a fun way to help kids learn counting, adding and subtracting, and using money. However, rules can be changed and games made into new games. Which is exactly what my daughter did. ‘Should we find the money?’ I asked. ‘No Dad, that just complicates things. My way is MUCH better.’
So much could be said about that comment. In end, I wanted to spend time with her, let her lead, and let her be in control. And I learned a new game and we had fun.
For me, the game wasn’t about the rules or doing things the way I, or the game creators, had wanted. It was about her, building trust and confidence. The game was secondary.
Organisational change is rooted in trust, in relationships. Sure it can be about power, but when it is made about power, it rarely goes well. Therefore, sometimes we, as change. makers, need to engage with others in a way that build relationship and trust and let others lead, control. When trust is there, when others feel seen and heard, it opens the door to all kinds of future discussions. And quite frankly, create the possibility that you might just be heard too.
‘Do onto others as you would have done to you’ springs to mind. The choice is up to us.